A Rekindled Fire

..Set a fire down in my soul, that I can't contain, that I can't control, cause I want more of You Jesus, I want more of You Jesus..


My savior is SOOOO amazing!! He rekindled a fire in me tonight that has been out for ENTIRELY too long! It is such a great thing to know that no matter how far we try to run from God, He is right there pulling us back in and loving us through it all.

All I want is to be in His will. I want to fulfill the call He placed on my life about 2 years ago.. I want to be so full of Him that nothing can stop me and everyone sees Him inside me!

His JOY is finally taking over me again!!


And ohhh it feels SO amazingggg! :)

Emotions

I have never had so many emotions flooding my mind at one time..

Happy. Sad. Lost. Found. Confused. Peace.

In this life we live there will many trials and struggles. Though we can't see what God can see, we have to trust in Him. It's in our weakest moment God makes us strong. It's at our lowest point, He lifts us up.

I don't why I'm going through this battle. I know God put me here for a reason, but it hurts so unbelieveably BAD. I thought it would be easy to follow God's will, but sometimes it gets so hard. The pain and hurt. But it's through this time that I will draw closer to Him. I know that. I just have to keep my head up.


There's a brighter day coming!!!

Psalms 30:5 "For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning."

Praise in the storm

"I will praise you in this storm and I will lift my hands for You are who You are no matter where I am"

That's been my motto the past couple days. Praising Him in the storm.

The past 3 days have been nothing but heartache for me. I couldn't eat or sleep or do anything but sit and stare at the ground.
But I learned something.
You give it to God and He will work it out. You put your trust in Him and everything works out for your good.

Consecration. Whatever it takes.

Today my heart is so heavy. A friend and I were talking about drawing closer to God and I just have such a burden to draw closer to Him. To consecrate myself and do whatever it takes to know Him more. So many people say that reading one chapter a day and saying one prayer is enough. But it's not. If you do the same thing everyday how will you ever grow closer?? When you meet a new friend and are getting to know them do you ask them the same questions everyday? No. Because if you did you would never grow in your friendship. It should be the same with God. No matter what it is or what it takes we should be willing to do whatever it is to grow closer. Even the small that seem like they wouldn't matter, do. A friend of mine said it nicely, she said even if it means telling God I'm not gonna wear another blue shirt, because that's my favorite color, until You draw me closer that's what am I'm gonna do. And that's so true. There are so many people who think that it doesn't take the small things and all that doesn't matter. But it DOES!!! God doesn't ask the same things from every person. Yes as Christians there are certain rules and guidelines in the Bible that we must follow. But there's even more than that. When we seek God and pray and study His word like we should, He will lay things on our heart to do for Him. Whether its not wearing a blue shirt, not eating a certain food or drinking a certain drink, it could be in the altar one day and He asks you to crawl. None of that really means anything to anyone around. They might laugh or wonder why. But it means EVERYTHING to God!!! I just wish people would see that it takes more than the routine. It doesn't mean you're sinning and it doesn't mean you're not saved. It is just giving up something for God. The Bible says "Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us." Hebrews 12:1. That verse differentiates between weight and sin. That means there could be something that God wants you to just set aside and get closer to Him. It doesn't mean you're sinning, if that's what He meant he wouldn't have said weight in that verse. It could just be saying God I'm not gonna call my girlfriend or boyfriend until I get this or that from You. It could be playing an instrument or singing in church that you're hiding behind and doing it because you feel obligated to when you could be down in the altar on your knees seeking God. It doesn't take music or singing for the Spirit to fall, all it takes is praise and love. it's all about drawing closer to Him and getting as much as you can from Him. Doing the same things you have always done won't get you a different result. 

Joy

Do you ever get so excited about God all you ever want to do is talk about Him and praise Him and grow closer to Him but everyone around doesn't? They just don't have that desire to push more and draw closer? That's how I've felt lately. Not that I think I'm better than anyone, because I'm not by any means. But lately I've had the "new convert" joy back. And no one else seems to be happy or want to take God seriously. I just want what he wants. I want to be as close as I can get. I want as much as He will give me. I want to be a mighty woman of God. I want to be the person that can get a prayer through in a second. Not take a week. I just want to be full of Him. But it seems like no one else has that same desire. Everyone is so busy all the time. I don't ever want to be too busy for God. I don't ever want to be so busy that my desire dwindles down to nothing. I want to continuously grow in Him. I want to spread my joy. I just want it to be an explosion of His joy to everyone around me. I want it to spread like wildfire. And again, I don't think I'm better than anyone, I just don't feel the joy from anyone else that I feel inside of me. I want to shout it from the roof tops! I want the boldness to witness to others and be a light. I am trying so hard not let others unjoyfulness (ha I made a word :]) get me discouraged. I want my joyfulness to spread to them. Not the opposite. I'm tired of conversing with others about things that don't profit the Lord. Not that it's bad conversations, it just won't matter in the end. I want to stay focused on Heaven. Just pray for me. I know the Lord is in control. And I can't wait to see what He has in store for my life!!

Prayer

♪"I can pray, until the walls fall down, until there's healing all around, that's something I can do"♪

I went to Gold Leaf Church of God tonight in Satsuma, AL. It was a great service. The pastor preached on prayer and its importance in our lives. How we have to pray until our flesh and carnal minds are gone and we're completely in the spirit. It really got me thinking...

How much more effective could we, could I, be if we all really got down to business with God? How much closer could we get if we just tried a little?? 

God wants to give us so much. He wants to pour his blessing out on us and give us all that we desire. And He would, if we would give Him to opportunity. So many of us are so worried about what others think and what others expect of us that we forget what GOD thinks and what HE expects and demands of us. If we would all focus on prayer and hearing from God we would see the true meaning of revival.

I know I don't ever want to go with Him by my side. I don't ever want to forget what He has done for me and where He brought me from. And I sure don't ever want to quit praying!

The moment we quit praying is the moment the devil comes in starts trying to attack us and pull us down. We must always stayed prayed up and on FIRE for the LORD. 

It takes more than just one little simple, "now I lay me down to sleep" type prayer. It takes really PRAYING. Putting your all into it. Showing God that you mean business, that you are not leaving until He blesses you. Getting the desire from Him. And staying there for a while. Tarrying. Not leaving until our cups are overflowing with power. 

So many people get stuck in the routine of saying one short little prayer and gettin gup and moving on. Not even giving God time to move. 

"But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." -Isaiah 40:31

More than I deserve

Tonight was amazing.

I felt God like I NEVER have before. It was so strong and just... amazing. There isn't really a word that can fully describe Him and His power.

Amazing.
Awesome.
Wonderful.

even those don't fully show the reality of it.

I was reminded of the time when I first got saved. How full of His love and power I was. I just let Him flow out of me and work in me with no "backtalk", so to speak. I'm learning to go back to that. To being obedient and submissive to the Lord. It's been a struggle getting back, but it is finally coming, and boy it's coming strong!

When the Lord says He is going to work something out, He means it!! He does so much more than we deserve. And oh how thankful I am!

One verse that the Lord showed me tonight was Isaiah 54:6-8 "For the Lord hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, and a wife of youth, when thou wast refused, saith thy God. For a small moment have I forsaken thee; but with great mercies will I gather thee. In a little wrath I hid my face from thee for a moment; but with everlasting kindness will I have mercy on thee, saith the Lord thy redeemer."

And that verse was exactly what I needed to here. Or read.

I am just so thankful for God's grace and mercy!!!


:D